Wednesday 10 April 2013

You know a plane is old when....

On the plane from Dubai to Athens

Let the record show that the economy section of this Emirates flight is far from salubrious.

The captains announcement begins with "do not smoke on the plane". "I repeat, do not smoke". "Again, do not smoke".  I guess you need to tell the Greeks a lot of times? So far nobody has smoked. Maybe a few years ago they should have had the captain at the Greek banks saying "do not invest in crappy mortgage CDIs, pay a bit of tax, save a bit of money, it's best in the long run"? "I repeat...."

You know the plane is old when there is a communal TV screen at the front of the cabin.

You know the plane is old when some seats recline and the ones that do recline have a range of motion at least as great as small rusted spring.

You know the plane is old when the seats have an ashtray on the armrest. "I repeat" says the Captain, do not smoke!"

Everything is Dubai is big / biggest / super sized (except cans of diet coke - our addiction. All cans of drink are similar to Australian size but diet coke cans are sweet lil 150ml cans).


Joke cans: Shouldn't mess with a man's addiction


In Dubai, the roads are all 5 to 8 lanes. The Dubai drivers believe that driving 2-3mm behind the car in front is mandated Just as long as you are travelling at (far) more than 100km per hour. Driving straight is, I believe, a crime punishable by death and as such in any 100m of Senna speed driving, you change lanes about 3 times (remember the 2-3mm rule also applies to the cars behind and the cars in adjacent lanes). The rationale behind each lane change remains elusive to us Westerner foreigner types.


That's one way to name streets






Yesterday's Desert Tour


Yesterday afternoon evening we headed off on a desert tour in a 6 seater 4 wheel drive. Family Dembo and a cool young couple - Jonathon the Somali French guy who had muscles on the top of his very large and bulgy muscles and Sara the Spanish girl who is the first person I have met from Tenerife. Lovely couple who met in London, live in Barcelona and talk English to each other but also speak French, Spanish and Somali. Ree and I met in Australia, live in Australia and speak English - but not that well.


Our tour was quite an experience. After a 50 minute drive into the desert, and a 15 minute stop at a stripmall right on the desert (where it was hard sell to buy a kafir, picture with a falcon, bubbly pipe or trinket). Never loved a hardsell but Jonathon the Somali (physique like that famous National Geographic photo of Zulu champion) liked it even less. Soon they left us alone.


Recessive Sephardic genes


The Desert Tour consisted of
  • 4 wheel driving up and down dunes in the desert. Lasted about 15 minutes which was more than enough. Think of a 15 minute rollercoater ride. Dunes were massive and steep. Not the lil ones you see in the pics below which was another stop so we could have our pictures taken (try sell them to you later - they must hate iPhones). Guys in sheets asking if you would like to "hold their Falcon" for a small nominal fee.

Drew runs where racing 4 wheel drives can't see him - sigh





  • There were about 40 x 4 wheel drives all careening in various directions with some in convoy pattern (remember the 3mm rule). Saw one passenger having a mega vommie out the window as the car careened over dunes. We all felt a little (Ree) to a lot (Lozza)  queasy except Drew who with grin as wide as a wide mouthed frog, screamed at the top of his voice "wheeeeee, this is the best ever" and Zoe who with Drew then proceeded to start singing along to Taylor Swift (turns out that's what the sullen driver liked to listen to).

  • Camel ride: Lame-o (it's a word now). Still kids loved it almost as much as Josie the camel liked me. We were one of the first groups to have a ride. Later the camels got a bit more grumpy and bucked an unsuspecting tourist off. Come to think of it, camels always seem grumpy - spose it's not hard to imagine why. Stuck in a desert walking folk in a small circle for no apparent reason. Can just imagine their camel conversation " I mean its just so demeaning". "Here we are, ships of the desert and all and we get to walk tourists in circle". 





  • Henna tattoos should that be your bag baby.

Come and get your Henna here


Zozo always happy to be one of the first


A tattoo for a week


Drew's tattoo - quite chuffed with himself



  • Fun on a dune - kids loved this bit the best I think. Classic pay for a great toy and the kid loves the box scenario.

Making a windsock for a toboggan of trash and cardboard (kid optimism)


Really, a photo of lil ole me?


  • Beautiful sunset with the kids trying to leap over the sun.
Super Drew jumps the sun


Zozo coiled



  • Bit of fancy dress.

Zoe's new travel apparel


  • Bedouin campsite thingy for fantastic meal.
  • Belly dancer for no apparent reason.
  • Back late to pack for early start tomorrow.





Dubai airport


Big,clean, modern and crowded. Shopping opportunities abound for those so inclined. Kids are getting good at doing the immigration thing and looking after each other. Zoe is really patient with Drew until he nooders once too much then surreptitious whack occurs. He cannot believe the injustice of it.


Dubai airport


Zoe looks after Drew



Landing in Athens soon - 4hr stopover then off to Crete. Looking forward to it. There will be much to talk about. The famous Cretan Paradox. Knossos - the Minotaur and the difference between a maze and a labyrinth (there is no Yallingup labyrinth)


Dorky blogging family on a plane

Enough

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